


Drunk In Distortion

by twilightopal



Category: Final Space (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Bittersweet, Childhood Trauma, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Mental Health Issues, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, hhhhh I haven’t written a fic like this in a long time, just an alternate end to S2 episode 2
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-04
Updated: 2019-07-04
Packaged: 2020-06-07 18:13:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,756
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19474615
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/twilightopal/pseuds/twilightopal
Summary: (Alternate Ending to S2 Ep 2, The Happy Place)Gary Goodspeed lost the earth. After being saved from near death by Todd’s hands, Gary's past begins to crawl wide and open as guilt begins to cloud him. But, everything changes when Nightfall confronts Gary. And it seems that Gary must confront something much bigger to move forward....





	Drunk In Distortion

Gary Goodspeed had lost the earth.

He could still recall every moment of the Galaxy One’s fight against Lord Commander. Mooncake being captured, losing Little Cato, losing Quinn—

_ Shut the hell up, mind _ .

He needed to stop thinking like this. It’s just like Nightfall said, no one has ever made in back from Final Space. But the thing was, he couldn’t. He’d been sitting here for about an hour and the thought of Quinn and everything that happened jabbed at his conscious constantly. Thinking about, it was starting to feel like something that had happened a long time ago.

Even so, he wouldn’t forget the last words that Quinn had said to him. Thinking about it made his chest feel tight—he tried to clear his mind of those words. It sometimes invaded his thoughts, to the point where sleep felt like something  _ unreachable _ . The bags under his eyes felt much heavier than they were in reality, and he let out a yawn.

_ It’s just sleep. Not a big deal _ .

His mind began to wander on what had just happened over an hour ago. He’d nearly died by someone’s own hands, someone who suffered all because he lost the earth. All these people could’ve died, lost  _ everything _ all because of him. There were times where he thought about what would’ve happened if he were sucked into the earth with everyone. As bad as it seemed—it sounded  _ much _ better to live through that than all this mess. But on the bright side, he did meet Mooncake and everyone else. It was the only good thing to come out of this mess, and even that was something with universe was trying to take from him. Little Cato was still alive, and sure, Clarence’s adopted children were pretty great, but who knows? The universe will absolutely try to screw him over for his mistakes. He’d fucked up so much that even fate could trip him over at any moment. He could feel the hairs on his neck become alert as each thought began to close up on him with each passing second. 

_ Inhale, exhale _ .

The one thing he learned from going to therapy (and never going back). The simplest function that did help him in most circumstances.

But in this case, it wasn’t working.

_ This usually works why isn’t it working why isn’t it working _ —

He could feel that familiar panic. That feeling that he absolutely  _ dreaded _ was coming when he didn’t want it to. He could feel his ears starting to ring out in pain, his chest tightening even more than before. His throat almost felt like sandpaper, and his legs were shaking to the point where he nearly locked his knees. Gary sat down, shaking. Tears began to well up in his eyes as his breathing became uneven. His stomach lurched, and a hand covered his mouth. He swallowed the rising bile on his throat, and let out a ragged breath.

_ Breathe breathe breathe breathe _ —

He could almost smell the presence of something burning. The atmosphere around him was completely changing, chanting ringing in his ears. 

**5....4....3....**

_ A rocket _ .

Not just any rocket. It was almost as if he could see him from so far away. He screamed, but nothing seemed to come out. The dams in his eyes began to overflow, and his face was wet with tears—he didn’t want to see it.

**2...**

He could see it—that person that was taken from him.

**1...**

_ D-Dad... _

**0.**

_ And then, an explosion ruptured through his body _ .

He ran. His legs felt like they were on fire—but he had to. He ran and ran but his world was distorted to the touch. Nausea ran throughout his body, and he opened the handle to the restroom with aggression. He sped to the toilet, and without warning, he heaved once and his dinner had left his stomach. The concept of time was practically nonexistent. His thoughts had become loaded as he kept heaving and shaking as tears ran down his face. He could hear Todd whispering in his ears, cursing and wishing a painful death to him. By the time he looked at himself in the mirror, his face had become pale, his body still a little shaky as he cleaned his face of small specks of vomit.

_ I’m a freakin’ mess, aren’t I? _

He opened the door, walking out renewed. That signature ‘ **Gary Goodspeed Smile** ’ was polished—the perfect reminder that Gary was a-ok and ready to find some good ol’ dimensional keys and save the universe in style.

But, a pit in his stomach appeared when he saw a familiar face walking in the hall.

_ Nightfall? _

“Oh, Gary.” Nightfall said, smiling.

“What’re you doing up this late?”

“J-Just had to take a  _ fat _ pee.” Gary replied.

Nightfall chuckled a little bit. Gary couldn’t help but smile faintly at the sight of her dimples. Whoever she smiles or laughed, her dimples were always plain in sight, and Gary couldn’t help but admire them. 

Nightfall stared at Gary plainly, smiling. She loved his enthusiasm, and when he smiled, it was almost like the sun was beaming onto her because Gary was like a star to her, internally and externally. However, that sense of enthusiasm and energy from Gary’s words felt as if all those factors had disappeared. His words felt almost forced, even.

_ Something was wrong _ .

“Hey, Gary?” Nightfall said.

“Let’s go somewhere else.”

Gary’s hand was taken by Nightfall, and the warmth of her hands almost felt comforting. Anxiety brewed inside of him, hoping that Nightfall hadn’t witnessed what had happened earlier. He kept wearing that trademark smile, and grinned in response to Nightfall’s wishes.

They sat down at a small booth in the ship’s dining hall, and Gary and Nightfall exchanged stares.

“You know, in  _ every _ timeline...the earth is pulled into Final Space.”

Gary’s attention was perked up. Nightfall’s eyes were so deep he could swim through them.

“ **I know you feel guilty, Gary** .”

_ Suddenly, Gary’s mind completely blanked out. _

Gary wanted to retort, but even a single word had suddenly become a struggle to let out.

“I just want you to know that  _ none _ of this is your fault. That’s just how everything was going to play out from that start. Believe me, I’ve been through the same scenario over and over again..” 

Gary’s body began to stiffen. There was that chance—that large chance that Nightfall knew about him. His father, everything. It made the pit on his stomach larger, and he could feel his skin beginning to pale. 

“I can tell just by the look on your face, Gary. There were a few timelines where you opened up to me. It wasn’t much, but I know that you’re not going to tell me either way.”

“I just want to know if you’re doing alright.”

_ I have to get out of here. _

“I’m fine, Nightfall. There’s nothing to worry about with ol’ Garebear over here!” Gary replied, forcing out a small chuckle. Gary got up out the chair, and waved goodnight to Nightfall, giving off the signature smile to cap it off. 

But suddenly, he could feel a hand forcefully turn him back. His heart jumped, and the hand turned him back to face Nightfall.

Nightfall’s expression was completely different. Her face was even more stern than it usually was, this deep blue eyes sucking him in, and not exactly in the pleasant way from earlier.

“Tell me, Gary.”

“ **Where’d you learn that fake smile** ?” 

Nightfall was digging into Gary nonstop. Gary could feel her comments piercing through him, trying to reach in, break through the barriers he’d kept up for so long. No words would come out of Gary’s mouth, but only a slightly uneven grin.

Nightfall began to grasp Gary slowly, putting one hand on his shoulder and another to his waist. His hands were shaking and his face was paler than before.

“Hey, Nightfall?” Gary asked, trying his bets to push out every word.

“ _ What if I’m not cut out to save the universe _ ?”

Nightfall’s grip began to loosen. Her features became less stressed as she answered Gary.

“Gary, I don’t think I’d be going through all these timelines, and all these coincidences didn’t just happen once. The universe chose you, and it knows for sure that you’re cut out for saving the universe.”

“ **It’s good enough for me, you know** ? I’ll always protect you and the others no matter what.”

It was as if Gary had been cut off from the current reality. The sentence that Nightfall had said—those words he  _ wished _ he couldn’t remember—were coming back to him. He thought the last time he’d hear them was with his encounter with Bolo, but those words came back, pouncing and haunting him once more. The words began ringing louder and louder in his head as he began clawing on his robot arm roughly. Nightfall grabbed that hand, straying it away from clawing any further. The mere touch of his hand left his thoughts in a rampage.

_ Let me go please let me go _ —

But it was as if Nightfall could read his mind. She wasn’t being overly pushy, nor was she trying to be blunt. She had genuine concern for Gary, and gently held onto him to stop him from moving any further. At this point, Gary’s breathing had started to go uneven again. Nightfall looked at Gary’s panicked figure, and looked at him closely.

And all Gary could do was look back, and give that signature smile. That sickening barrier that left him completely disconnected. Nightfall’s eyes widened. She’d never seen Gary like that, even in the timelines where he did open up to her. Gritting her teeth, she went to grasp Gary’s hand, but she could feel the sensation of pain in her back. I’m just a second, she realized—

_ Gary had pushed her to the ground.  _

**_And by the time she’d gotten up, Gary was nowhere to be seen_ ** _. _

Gary ran and ran with all the strength in his body. His father’s words of encouragement were slowly becoming those of agony, and his mind rang with intrusive thoughts. He wasn’t exactly sure how far he’d gone, but it didn’t matter. He had to get away from her, from everything, from all the pain and responsibility—and no matter how far he ran, it would always catch up with him. Hell, he could run for ages if he could. But that wouldn’t stop until—

**THUD** !

Gary had tripped over something. Not exactly something, but when his vision had gotten clearer, it  _ clearly _ wasn’t some large object.

“Gary? Why are you up so late?” That familiar metallic voice filled him with a spark to relief.

“H-HUE?” Gary stuttered.

HUE slowly walked up to Gary, his feet banging at the floor with each step. HUE put a hand to Gary’s chest, taking his time to analyze his behaviors.

“Your breathing is becoming uneven, Gary. Are you currently undergoing an anxiety attack?” HUE asked.

“Don’t make it so freakin’  _ obvious _ , HUE.” Gary’s voice wavered as he spoke to HUE, scooting up to the wall. HUE copied Gary’s motions immediately, and plopped next to him. 

“You know, if the earth is  _ ever _ returned to its proper place, I will have to file this on your record.” HUE said.

“Yeah, yeah. I know, HUE. I don’t get why 

you’re trying to send me to a therapist. Those people are freakin’ creeps.” Gary replied.

“How exactly are therapists considered  _ creeps _ , Gary?”

“They’re asking you all sorts of questions about your life and all kinds of weird stuff. They’re like spies, HUE. Spies that learn information about you and send it to some sort of underground organization.”

“Gary, that is a therapist’s job. They are trained to help those who struggle with physical and mental setbacks. Like you.”

“HUE, I told you, I’m not—”

“You have a medical diagnosis. It’s something I’ve taken into consideration with my treatment of you during your imprisonment. Being in denial is a harmful behavior.” 

Gary stayed silent. He knew that HUE was right, and that he was clearly acting like nothing had happened to him. Gary groaned, and buried his head in his knees. HUE had raised one of his arms onto Gary’s back, rubbing in circles. Gary would’ve asked why HUE had started doing it in the first place, but it didn’t exactly bother him. It actually felt  _ relaxing _ . He could feel his heart rate going down a little bit, and his breathing was starting to get even again. All of sudden, lots of things began to hit him at once. Fatigue began to wash over him quicker than he could ever run, he had a headache from how much he’d been crying, and his stomach churned from how roughly it had been emptied. He didn’t notice that HUE had now pulled him a bit closer to him, continuing the circling motion around his back. It almost felt like he was in a trance, and he could feel himself getting swept in a wave a fatigue. He struggled to stay awake, and fought until he finally succumbed to the world of dreams.

~

“—and that, my friends, is how I formed...  **La Résistance** .” Tribore said with pride.

Ash and Fox clapped, their eyes sparkling in awe. Little Cato stared at Tribore, not as impressed. Nightfall walked into the room, leaning on the wall.

“Hey, has anyone seen Gary?” Nightfall asked.

“No, but I see  _ this _ little cutie over here!” Ash replied, petting Little Cato on the head. His cheeks began to turn a bright pink, and he swatted her hand away, hissing in embarrassment.

“Something happened, and well—let’s just keep it at that.” Nightfall said, forcing her words out a bit.

Suddenly, and maybe it seemed like fate—Mooncake came flying into the room. It seemed that Mooncake was trying to tell them something.

“Chookity! Chook Chook~” Mooncake said, flying out immediately afterward. Nightfall followed after Mooncake, speeding out of the room. Little Cato and the others trailed along (Besides Clarence, who was managing finances).

Upon looking through the hallways, Mooncake had led them to Gary and HUE, who were both resting against the wall. A light snore emitted from Gary, the bags under his eyes showing his fatigue loud and clear. Mooncake slowly snuggled into Gary, and stuck himself there as a sleeping spot. Nightfall wasn’t exactly sure what convinced her to do it, but she slowly sat down to the left of Gary, and closed her eyes. Soon, Little Cato has joined the mix, then Tribore, and even Ash and Fox joined in on the snooze fest. By the time Nightfall was on the verge of falling asleep. nearly everyone had fallen asleep quickly. Everyone except HUE, who couldn’t exactly  _ fall asleep _ to begin with.

“I feel as if I am not very aware of what Gary is truly thinking.” HUE said to Nightfall.

“I am only an  **AI** . my functions and capabilities are limited compared to the human mind.”

“That doesn’t mean you’re not helpful to Gary. Far from it. AI like you are what make people like Gary strive to recover.” Nightfall replied.

“I don’t know much about Gary’s past experiences, but I do know that he’s had a hard time coping with them for a  _ long time _ —and if he’s going to save the universe, he needs help overcoming the roadblocks he’s built for himself.”

“You know, I had saved Gary from death once. On  _ Day 472 _ of his sentence, he had attempted to end his own life using some of the Galaxy One’s own medicinal supplements. He had cried over and over again about how  _ worthless _ he was and that he wants to see his father again. I’m not sure how to comprehend his words, but when you mention Gary having a hard time believing in his struggles, you are correct in every aspect.”

“Well, maybe we can help him.  _ All of us _ .” Nightfall said, smiling at HUE.

“Is this what you call—an emotional support group?” HUE said, a ring of curiosity in his voice.

“Sort of, yeah. A  _ team squad _ , as Gary likes to call it.”

“ **Hell yeah, dawg** .”

Nightfall laughed at HUE’s comment. She looked up at the stars, and smiled.

This time, they’d save the universe as not just as crew members, but as a team. Slowly but surely, Nightfall has gained hope—hope that this would be the timeline that changed everything.

_ And in her heart, she knew it would. _

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! This is a fic I feel like I’m really proud of, and I hope you guys enjoyed what I wrote! Your comments and feedback make me more motivated to write and improve! I feel like ever since S2 started my writing mojo had come back, so expect more content from me in the future!


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